Frowning and crossing your arms is the equivalent of throwing Kryptonite at the Superman you’re hawkin’ on, but what about barely noticeable body language?
If you’re skeptical about how the subtlest body language affects your love life, play a game with me.
Straighten your arm as if you were doing a “Heil Hitler” salute. What’s the feeling? Dominant, aggressive, hateful, right?
It isn’t your arm that’s creating those feelings, by the way. It’s your palm.
Keep your arm in the air, but now turn the palm up. What’s the feeling now? Open, inviting, fun. Turn the palm down and you feel like Hitler. Turn it up and you feel like…
Now, if a simple palm movement has that kind of emotional impact on you, imagine the effect it has on other people.
Clearly we don’t go around saluting like SS guards, but you’d be surprised at how every day palm gestures can have nearly the same negative effects. Quick example: I have a good friend who’s fairly disliked by a good many people. Although I think he’s kind and generous, some folks have taken me aside and said, “There’s something about him that rubs me the wrong way.”
That “something” is the way he uses his palms. In the Hitler example, you saw the raw emotional power of a simple palm position, but again, that’s not realistic. Here’s how your palms can make somebody dislike you (like my friend) in a real conversation.
Stand in front of a mirror so you can see the full effect.
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