Host of HBO's The Sex Inspectors and author of Meet The Hottie In The Corner.

Top Ten Most Disturbing Sex Toys.

#1 Area 51 Love Doll.

love doll Top Ten Most Disturbing Sex Toys.

This inflatable beauty features, and I quote from their ad copy, “A pussy-shaped mouth, 3 supple breasts, suction cup fingers and ass-shaped ears make it the kinkiest love slave in the galaxy.”

#2 Baby Jesus Butt Plug

jesus butt plug Top Ten Most Disturbing Sex Toys.

Anything I say will send me to hell, so I’m taking a pass.

#3 Houdini Locking Steel Cock Chastity

cock chastity Top Ten Most Disturbing Sex Toys.

Sure, slap ten pounds of steel onto my penis so I can’t pee or masturbate–I got a few hours to kill. The ratcheting handcuff is a nice touch, I must say.

4. Anal Speculum

anal speculum Top Ten Most Disturbing Sex Toys.

A game changer for the sadistic proctologist inside you.

5. Rubber Fisting Mitten

fistin mitten Top Ten Most Disturbing Sex Toys.

To the elbow? That’s a bunch of crap.


6. Tongue Vibrator

tongue vibrator Top Ten Most Disturbing Sex Toys.

Cat got your tongue? It left me speechless. A disembodied tongue licking you? Wes Craven must have designed this.

7. Auto Suck

auto suck Top Ten Most Disturbing Sex Toys.

It’s designed to plug into any car cigarette lighter, so naturally the manufacturer has this warning on the box: ‘Do not use while driving!’

8. The Vagina Foot

vagina foot Top Ten Most Disturbing Sex Toys.

It’s a rubber foot with a vagina heel. Feets don’t fail me now!

9. Dildo Gas Mask

dick mask Top Ten Most Disturbing Sex Toys.

An anal probe for the partner who just ate a burrito?


10. Piss Hole Stuffer

piss hole Top Ten Most Disturbing Sex Toys.

Words fail.

pixel Top Ten Most Disturbing Sex Toys.

8 Responses to “Top Ten Most Disturbing Sex Toys.”


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