Mike Alvear's Urge & Merge

 

A lot smaller than you think.

 

 

The six inch myth started with Kinsey’s famous study in the 50’s that asked two thousand guys to self-report the size of their prize.  Yes, SELF-REPORT.   Two objections, as I see it: 

 

1)  Starting with maps, men believe that an inch equals a mile.  Did Kinsey really believe that guys would tell the truth?

2)  Would you believe anything a man says when he’s holding his penis?

 

Researchers, unfazed by male hallucinations, decided to take matters into their own hands and do the measuring themselves.  And the results?  Study after study shows the average erect penis size is about 5.2 inches.   

 

I swear if men were born with business cards, they’d read, “Professional Liar.”

 

Of course, most of this lying covers up a widespread insecurity, so we can have a little pity.  Every guy feels like he’s got the smallest tool in the lockers. The penis enlargement emails that seem to be targeted specifically at us don’t help–especially the ones from our moms.

If you’re going to compare yourself to other guys at least level the playing field. You’re seeing their junk at a forty-five degree angle but looking straight down at yours, which makes it look tiny. So, don’t look down; look in the mirror.

But if you really want to compare there’s only one way to do it–Measure yourself.  Here’s how contemporary researchers suggest you do it:  

1. Get undressed in room temperature. Remember, cold causes “Shrinkage.”

2. Use a cloth ruler. You can’t measure curvatures with a straightedge.

3. Lie on your back and start where the base of your penis meets your stomach. This is the scientific way of measuring an erect penis. Do NOT start from the back of your balls. That’s how “truthiness” starts.

4. Round up to the nearest centimeter, not the nearest foot. I know; it sucks.

5. Read it and weep. The average erect penis is 5.2 inches.

 

Quit weeping–you’re staining my blog.  Always remember, it’s not how the cucumber looks on the salad but what it does off the plate.  

Click here to see a video of how it’s done….

This entry was posted Mar. 21st, 2009 at 6:11 pm. It was tagged average dick size, average penis size, average size, Average Size Dick, average size penis, Average Testicle Size, Condom Size Chart, dick measure, Does Size Matter, Does Size Really Matter, how to measure a penis, how to measure girth, how to measure penis, how to measure the penis, how to measure your dick, how to measure your penis, matters of size, measure dick, measure penis, penis enlargement without tools patches or pills, penis measure, size matters, Size Matters Debate, size matters to women, the average penis size, the truth about penis enlargement, What Is a Good Size Dick, what is an average penis size, what is average penis size, what is the average penis size. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.